Well hello my people. How are you liking that long book I wrote? I’ve been dying to write a sequel but really, who has the time? I’ve been too busy saving people from natural disasters while leaving others to perish, inspiring songs from The Beach Boys and Joan Osbourne, helping celebrities win Oscars and […]Read more "Season 2, Episode 18: “Forgive Me Father,” As Reviewed By God"
You really learn a lot about someone when they’ve had a brush with death. If they get all weepy about the meaning of life, they are the selfish ones. They have the delusion that they are here for a reason. It’s the ones that didn’t care, the ones with nothing to lose. that have something […]Read more "Season 2, Episode 15: “Before and After,” As Reviewed By Frank Underwood"
Sophia, this eldest daughter, whose advice was so effectual, possessed a strength of understanding, and coolness of judgment, which qualified her, though only nineteen, to be the counsellor of her mother, and enabled her frequently to counteract, to the advantage of them all, that eagerness of mind in Blanche Devereux which must generally have led […]Read more "Season 2, Episode 12: “The Sisters”, as Reviewed By Jane Austen"
R. J. MCBOWLAN, HEAD WRITER: We wanted to do a Christmas episode that wasn’t like any others. We had thought about doing a “Christmas Carol” version with the ghosts of the pasts of all the ladies, but then I thought, let’s go edgier! Let’s add some really scandalous moments. CRISPIN DALY, STORY EDITOR: I thought, […]Read more "Season 2, Episode 11: “Twas The Nightmare Before Christmas”, As Told By An Oral History From The Writers’ Room"
Some people live on this earth, contributing nothing, taking up resources, just existing. I am lucky that I have made my contribution to the world, and will die knowing my legacy. It is this: Ah, yes. When we have a tall, lean statuesque woman, it is best to dress her in swaths of crushed velvet […]Read more "Season 2, Episode 10, “Love, Rose”; As Reviewed By The Designer of Dorothy’s Monstrous Teal Crushed-Velvet Tuxedo Dress"
This guy’s name is Michael Zbornak. The year he turned 29, he made 4900 dollars, which really pissed him off because it was three shy of a hundred dollars a week .He rents one home in the East Village which he shares with four other grown men. He plays jazz gigs for $50 bucks a […]Read more "Season 2, Episode 7: “Family Affair” as Reviewed By Jordan Belfort"
Let’s just get this out of the way, this episode was just filler based around a scene where they all since about Miami. It’s a catchy diddy, music by Rose and lyrics by Blanche. Blanche used to write poetry in high school, because she was tall and therefore fucking disgusting. Miami is nice / So […]Read more "Season 2, Episode 6, “Big Daddy’s Little Lady”, As Reviewed By Me"
Okay, settle down kids, this isn’t a chance for you to goof off during fourth period, we have some serious stuff to talk about. To get down with. To rap about. Thompson, put that ipad away and focus up here! This isn’t the time to play Candy Crusher or send pictures of your genitals to […]Read more "Season 2, Episode 5: “Isn’t It Romantic?”, as Reviewed By a Football Coach At a School Assembly"
Glad I’m in hell, my crappy life on earth was not much to remember. At least not the last part of it. Life up until 40 was pretty damn great. There’s not a band in the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame that I have not partied with. I went to burning man on a […]Read more "Season 2, Episode 4: “It’s a Miserable Life”, as Reviewed By The Ghost of Frieda Claxton"
Blanche is all excited to see her father, who she calls Big Daddy. She misses The South, which to her, seems like, To Sophia, The South seems like, Blanche dresses in her Sweet Sixteen outfit for Big Daddy, and Big Daddy checks out her rack. Yea, it’s weird. Like a incestuous Gone With the Wind. […]Read more "Season 1, Episode 24: “Big Daddy”, as Reviewed By Buzzfeed"